By A Thread

If you thought that I hated the fact that Larry the Cable Guy is a Nebraska Cornhuskers fan, you can’t imagine how much I hate this fucktard being a Red Sox fan. It makes me want to hit myself over the head hard with a hammer, but, like, harder. That’s my best impression of Mr. Cook. It almost sucks as much as he does.

So here we go. Six more games to go for the Red Sox and for the New York Yankees. The Sox are going to make the playoffs with no worse than a wild card berth. I would say that “earning” the wild card spot would be a let down and a gateway to a first round exit at the hands of the Cleveland Indians or the Los Angles Angels of Anaheim by way of Orange County in California. Either way, if the Sox roll into the playoffs with no momentum by losing the division look for a similar flame out on par with 2005 after being swept by the Chicago White Sox in the ALDS.

I didn’t watch any baseball this weekend. No, not because I hate watching them play at The Trop, but because I was entrenched in wedding boot camp hell. If you’re Catholic and were married in a Catholic Church you need not ask, you’re already well aware of the atrocities perpetrated by the uber-parishioners that volunteer to run these types of things.

From what I hear from a source that was at all three games in Tampa, Friday’s game was "your typical blowout," Saturday was a "valiant comeback" and Sunday was "too close for comfort." The loss yesterday dropped the Sox back to only leading the Yanks by 1 ½ games. Luckily for Red Sox Nation, the Blue Jays defeated the Yanks in the Bronx 4-1 this afternoon. I actually listened to the game at work. Man, I fucking hate John Sterling.

The Sox and Yankees have decidedly different paths to the postseason. Boston will play host to the Oakland Athletics for two games and will wrap up the season with a four game series against the Minnesota Twins. They Sox have played the A’s like complete shit this season, and the Twins could be dangerous depending on how they view the benefit of wrapping up the season on the road at Fenway Park. They’re young and tend to play over their heads while winning, and on the verge of looking like a AAA team while on the short end of the stick. I’ve circled this series on my calendar, and it’s been that way since about June. I know if the Twins are responsible for the Sox losing the American League East, it will no doubt trigger a lot of shit from my “friends” over at TwinsTown.

The Yankees played their last regular season game in Yankees Stadium today. That means they'll finish on the road. Don't get your AL East Division hats out yet...it's against the Devil Rays and Orioles.

I’m not one to disappoint, so here is a taste of what I went through this weekend…

Going Down

Yes, losing to the Yankees on Sunday was awful. What made it even more awful was that it was at the hands of Derek Jeter. It always seems to be Jeter. As if losing in the eighth inning AGAIN wasn’t enough the Sox had to tease everyone by loading the bases in bottom of the ninth, coming within one run and sending David Ortiz to the plate only to pop out and end the game.

Last night wasn’t much better having the 72 year-old Frank Thomas go deep three times against Boston pitching. Did I mention the Yankees won last night against Baltimore? If the Orioles win one game in the Bronx this week I’ll be shocked and tickled surprised. So you know what that means, if the Sox want to protect their dwindling lead, currently at 3 ½ games in the AL East, they’ll have to win out in Toronto, a place that has been unforgiving in the past two seasons for the Sox.

Tonight Jon Lester will try his best to win his fifth game on the season against A.J. Burnett. The positive in the Yank’s v. O’s game is that Mike Mussina is on the mound. Hopefully the Orioles can rough him up a bit for an early lead and hang on with Jon Leicester on the mound, but I doubt it.

I would like to take a minute and talk about something else. This ‘something’ is going on in the New England area and has to do with the NFL and nothing to do with the Sox. Yes, I’m going to take a minute and write about Bill Belichick, the New England Patriots and SpyGate or whatever the hell they’re calling it today.

This is the last story we should be worrying about when it comes to the NFL and how they handle the league. I’m tired of reading sportswriters across the country labeling this happening as the end of the NFL’s reign on top of the sports spectrum here in our country. I don’t really see something like this derailing the momentum that the NFL has built up over the past decade or so.

Beyond the league wide implications, the attention that this story is getting is getting a tad ridiculous. Is videotaping a violation of NFL rules? Yes, it is. Do I think that the Patriots, Belichick and his staff are the only people stealing signals in some way shape or form? No, absolutely not, he’s just the only one who’s been caught. He’s been fined, sure it’s not that much, but he was still fined. If someone told me I’d be fined for 10% of my pay for an entire year, I’d be pretty pissed and see it as harsh. Losing draft picks hurts the Patriots as well when it comes to the "punishment fitting the crime." You can’t punish the team for something the coaching staff perpetrated.

Some people want to compare this situation to players getting suspended along the lines of a Michael Vick or someone like Adam "Pac-Man" Jones, but that's comparing apples to oranges and makes those people who make the argument look retarded. People who think that league commissioner Roger Goodell is being too soft on coaches and too harsh on players need to dig in their couch cushions for a quarter and put a brain on lay-a-way. Those players who I mentioned (among a few others) violated NFL rules and broke the law. The last time I checked, videotaping signals from opposing coaches was not a felony in any state.

The influx of everyone squawking about this gets a little overwhelming. People steal signals all the time in baseball and in the NBA. Everyone cheats on something, this time Belichick was just unfortunate and unlucky when he got caught. Most people cheat on their taxes, at their jobs or on their spouses. Come on everyone, get over it.

To Hines Ward and Donovan McNabb complaining about getting playoff and Super Bowl victories back? Look no further than the Patriots and Chargers game Sunday night. To me it doesn’t look like they need the help of videotaping. You should probably worry about your own team.

Look, I’m no Belichick lover or apologist. I just get tired of people making a mountain out of a molehill on this issue and a myriad of other issues in general. This story is the lead on just about any sports program and talk radio station when it comes to the NFL. What about Kevin Everett? How about how the Players Association is planning on dealing with the U.S. Congress regarding retired players’ pensions/benefits? You don’t hear anything about that. Why? Because people are stupid and they want to hear about this whole videotaping debacle over and over and over again.

For those that can't get enough cheating, here is a story about a prominent NFL player caught cheating from earlier in his career.

Speaking of football, I'd like to give a shout out to Chris Cooley who put my fantasy team over the top last night. Too bad he has a predilection to play in his underwear in front of teammates...And his hair sucks. It looks like he has band-aids in there.

Bounce Back

Last night sucked. Last night sucked about as much as anything in September can suck other than a monumental collapse from the Red Sox. I thought last night’s come from behind victory from the New York Yankees was the start of that.

The Red Sox took a 7-2 lead into the top of the eighth inning with normally automatic Hideki Okajima taking the mound in his usual set up role. Jason Giambi hit a solo shot, the Robinson Cano followed suit with a homer to dead center as well. Not long after Jonathan Papelbon was in taking it on the chin for another three runs as the Yankees pulled off an improbable comeback against one of baseball’s best 1-2 punches out of the bullpen.

I got kicked out of my fiancé’s apartment last night for assaulting the love seat and had to go back to my place to watch the less than thrilling conclusion. The Sox responded to last night’s heartbreaker by routing the Yankees 10-1 today behind Josh Beckett’s 19^th win. The win also came against the Yankee’s best starter in Chin Meng Wong.

Yankee’s captain Derek Jeter got the only run on the day for the Bronx Bombers with a solo home run in the top of the first while Boston countered in the bottom half with an RBI single from Mike Lowell. JD Drew broke the 1-1 tie in the bottom of the fifth with a poke down the left field line. The Red Sox would go on to score eight more runs and score in each inning for the duration of the contest.

Eric Hinske was the catalyst for the win today on an out. Hinske was called out on a play to the plate after a short chopper hit by Dustin Pedroia but absolutely leveled Yankee’s catcher Jorge Posada in the sixth. The Sox scored three more runs after that physical play that the hometown Sox fans ate up.

Jacoby Ellsbury came into the game and smacked in three runs for the injured Kevin Youkilis, who was hit in the wrist by Wong and forced to leave the game. The Sox didn’t really bat an eye at the play I guess to not fan the flames between some heated exchanges already this season that involved Youkilis. However, in the bottom of the seventh with nobody on and two out, Beckett hurled a pitch in the direction of Giambi’s wrist and hit him. Nothing happened, but at that point in the game I guess I didn’t really see the point. You want to protect your players and go after the opponents first baseman obviously, but after the previous night’s comeback I wouldn’t take any chances.

Dustin Pedroia almost seems more and more of a lock for AL Rookie of the Year as the season winds down. Today wasn’t his best outing only going 1-for-5 and leaving five on base, but is clearly the frontrunner. I’ve seen some other picks on other sites/blogs (ahem, Reggie Willits?) but with almost 100 more at bats, more hits, twice as many doubles, a higher OPS, a significantly better average and half as many strike outs I don’t think Willits will be making too much noise for ROY when compared to Pedroia. Willits also has a goose egg on the year for dingers.

Tomorrow night Roger Clemens will take on Curt Schilling in a battle of which older pitcher will break down first. I’m sure Clemens will get a warm Fenway reception. With a win the Sox will take a 6 ½ game lead into the final two weeks of the season.

BOOM!

It wasn’t a monster shot, but David Ortiz picked up his first game winning walk off home run of the season last night off Devil Ray’s reliever Al Reyes. Ortiz’s shot in the bottom of the ninth sealed the series in Boston's favor against the D-Rays and was the final two of all five runs batted in by Ortiz on home runs in the 5-4 victory. Mr. Clutch’s shot last night was the ninth walk-off of his career.

If Big Papi hadn’t picked up his 30^th and 31^st on the season last night the Sox would be looking at possibly bringing only a 3 ½ game lead into this weekend’s series with New York. Good thing for Boston Ortiz’s day off earlier in the week helped them out quite a bit. More than quite a bit, he was the only pulse in an otherwise anemic offensive performance last night.

Jon Lester was the second Boston starter in a row to get roughed up by the Devil Rays bats. He made it only two outs into the fourth inning giving up eight hits, walking four and surrendering all four earned runs on the evening. The bullpen came in and preserved any hope for the Sox to come back late in the game, with Julian Tavarez pitching three scoreless (shocking) and closer Jonathan Papelbon picking up his first win on the year. His streak of scoreless appearances is now at 16.

Stealing bases has been virtually non-existent in Boston’s game plan for almost 100 years, at least when it comes to having more than one base-stealing threat on the team. Coco Crisp stole his 25^th base last night in the sixth. Julio Lugo currently has 29 on the year. It’s helped Boston move runners over into scoring position without having to rely on constant hitting. Having either guy score from first on a double or well placed single doesn’t hurt much either. I wrote back in May that the new found speed would help to win games that in the past Boston would have struggled to capture. So far, it’s helped them out in about five or six situations I can count in games I’ve watched. It’s hard to say how much that component has actually helped in the wins and losses column, it’s just good that it’s there. I’ll leave it at that.

Boston’s off for the night and the Yankees will try to go for the sweep up at the Rogers Center tonight in Toronto and will start rookie Ian Kennedy. If the Yanks win they’ll pull within 4 ½ of the AL East lead. In a KC Bean Boy note to the Jays, try winning a game goddamnit.

Oh yeah, that's Sir Paul McCartney cheering on the Yankees in New York. I always fucking hated Paul.

Wild One

All I can say about this week and sports is that it’s going to be tough on me. It’s going to probably take a few years off of my life actually. Between last night’s game, the series with the Yankees this weekend and the Nebraska game against USC on Saturday night I think I may end up with an aneurysm by Sunday night.

Speaking of the hit-fest that went down in Boston last night, it was one hell of an up and down game to watch. I’m surprised I even hung in there after the Devil Rays went up 8-1 in the top of the fourth inning. I flipped to the Yankees and Blue Jays game and thought that the Yanks would pull within four games now after Giambi's grand slam. I was convincing myself that I’m not as interested in baseball now that the college football and Nebraska football seasons had started two weeks ago. Then I thought, who the fuck am I kidding? Who was there when the Huskers went 5-6 enduring their first losing season and missed their first bowl game in 35 years? Who was there that same year my favorite NFL team went 2-14? That’s right, the Red Sox cleared all of that up with a World Series victory. Had Boston been swept in the ALCS by the Yankees, I may have gone off the deep end in '04.

Mike Lowell came up big last night with four hits and scoring three times. Lowell has done a heck of job filling in for Manny while he rehabs his oblique. Hopefully he keeps this level of play in the postseason. And Boston will make the playoffs at this point. If they fold and let the Yankees back in to the race for real this weekend they’ll win the Wild Card at least. As it stands today the Red Sox are nine games ahead of Detroit, who is four games back of New York in the Wild Card race. It would take a monumental collapse and I think Boston is too good to have that happen with only 16 games left. Still, it would be very disappointing to relinquish that lead the Sox have enjoyed pretty much all season.

Tim Wakefield had the shortest outing of this season last night only going three innings and giving up 10 hits with seven earned. Usually Wake is automatic against the Rays, but for some reason they had the knuckleball figured out. Not to be outdone, the Sox roughed up the Rays bullpen last night for 11 runs and victimized them during the three inning turn around where they racked up 13 runs, including a six run sixth.

Kevin Youkilis came up big in the six with a three run triple that put the Sox on top 12-9 after Dustin Pedroia tied it at 9 all with a solo shot. Just a stat, but a good one… The Sox hit for the cycle as a team in the sixth inning alone.

It’s good to see that the Sox didn’t just pack it in and let the D-Rays trounce all over them when the Sox knew they needed that game last night to keep pace over the Yankees. If you think big league ball players don't check the scores on the big boards around stadiums, you're nuts. They knew they needed to come back and win and they did. What bothers me the most is that still the perception is that the Yankees are accustomed to winning and the Red Sox are self-overanalyzing losers who will fold when it’s crunch time. Last night was a gut check for the Sox and hopefully they picked up some much needed momentum to close out the series with a win tonight and for the series this weekend against New York.

Jon Lester will go for his fifth win on the season and will try to stay perfect against 4-14 Edwin Jackson who is 1-1 against the Sox this season.

StFU - College Football Edition

Hey Mike Hart, in the last four games you’ve played in you and your team have been beaten 417-12, so stop making guarantees that your team is going to win this Saturday against Notre Dame. Just for the love of God, stop fucking talking. Stop being so pissed off and so serious about winning. It's gay.

I know the Irish suck right now, but I don’t care if you're preparing to play Temple or Ann Arbor West High, just shut up. In fact, stop talking all together. Now is not the time for guarantees. Unless you're practicing to be a used car salesman. I guarantee you have that in you because no one else can sell your shitty Wolverine team to their own fans but you.

At this point Lloyd Carr and staff should be prohibiting any players from talking to the media at all. Hell, he shouldn't let them talk to their parents about the program. The seniors are "going to do their job" in getting the team ready? Yeah, look how well that worked against the I-AA champion Appalachian State Mountaineers and the Oregon Ducks. You didn’t just lose these games at the “Big House” and in your home state, you were flat out embarrassed in front of a nation. I couldn’t turn on a TV in any language last week without hearing that clip of the radio announcer from App State sounding like someone was grabbing his balls with vice grips after they won.

Here is how it breaks down, Mr. Hart. You need to shut the fuck up and go out and try and beat a Notre Dame team that is just as shitty and normally just as overrated as your team. The Michigan team last season was no better and maybe worse than the team that lost to Nebraska in the 2005 Alamo Bowl, and somehow the Wolverines not only found themselves in the number two spot behind equally overrated Ohio State last November, but in the national title hunt/discussion of all places. Does anyone else think the Big 10 is overrated as well? Because I sure do. Hopefully Michigan’s performance thus far and Ohio State’s mediocre showing AT HOME against Akron will signify that the Big 10 is not all it’s cracked up to be, finally. Oh, and Notre Dame doesn’t become a national powerhouse until they win a damn bowl game because I say so. Talk about overrated. Don't get me started on fatass Charlie Weiss and the Cryin' Irish.

Back to Hart. His team, despite it’s loss, was still thinking about a Big 10 championship this season before getting schooled by Oregon. That was the one positive I heard out of Michigan apologists last week. "Oh, they still have the Big 10 title in front of them." Yeah, way way far out the fuck in front of them. They’ll be lucky if they sneak into a bowl game this year. I'll take that back a bit, they could make it to post season play but probably playing Montana State in the Idon'tgiveaflyingfuck.com Bowl, but until that time..Mike Hart, shut the fuck up.

Riddled With...

Ineptitude, offensive impotence…take your pick for last night's "performance" I guess.

The Red Sox looked a little more than lacking in the runs department last night, they looked absolutely clueless. With the Yankees now moving in to within five games of Boston’s lead in the AL East, the next three weeks will show you what kind of team the Sox are. Will they find a way to win? Or will they fold and relinquish their lead they’ve held for about 140 odd games or so?

The injuries are starting to pile up and make their presence felt. Manny Ramirez was an obvious scratch for the game, David Ortiz was held out of the lineup because of the ongoing issues with his right knee, and even backup catcher Doug Mirabelli will not catch for Tim Wakefield in tonight’s contest because of a nagging left hamstring.

Curt Shilling had an otherwise great performance last night, only giving up one run on a sacrifice fly in the fifth inning to Josh Williams. It would have been a good night for the veteran, except for the fact that the Boston lineup decided not to score any runs. Scott Kazmir is a hell of a good pitcher, I’ll give him that, and with Manny and Papi out of the lineup it makes things more difficult. But come on, one damn run? Shut outs happen but it just hurts when it comes at the hands of the Devil Rays.

On the brighter side, the Sox did manage to keep pace with their lead by taking three of four from the Baltimore Orioles this past weekend as the Yankees swept the Kansas City Royals not 10 minutes from where I live. Thanks Royals. Boston had a chance to pick up another half game on the idle Yanks last night but failed to do so. The Yankees will open a three game set north of the border in Toronto against the Blue Jays before setting course for Boston on Friday.

Boston will try to regroup tonight as Wakefield goes for his 17^th win on the year. He will take on five game winner Andy Sonnanstine. The Sox will basically have to close out the D-Rays tonight and tomorrow if they hope to have more than a four or five game lead on the visiting Yankees come Friday.

Starting Off September Right

I’m sure the Sox are just about as tired of playing in games where players about get belted with pitches that lead to bench clearing staring contests as I am sitting on my couch watching them.

Baltimore Orioles pitcher Daniel Cabrera threw a head-high, high and tight pitch on Dustin Pedroia that ended up behind his head after he was distracted by Coco Crisp just enough to balk him in. Crisp was on third base in the top of fourth inning and got just enough of a lead between third and home to get Cabrera off balance to the point of balking on the previous play. It was really a thing of beauty to watch.

Immediately after Francona and other players from the visiting dugout protested the pitch which led to umpire Mike DiMuro handing out warnings to both benches that started the whole situation into a tailspin. Boston was pissed because they got a warning, Baltimore flew off the handle because Boston was complaining. It boils down to Cabrera being pissed that he balked in a run and being frustrated with his team being one of the worst since after the All-Star Break, and losing 10 (before they lost the game last night) in a row at Camden Yards.

You can look at situations like this in one of two ways, either baseball players are a bunch of whinny pussies (which, next NBA players, are some of the biggest) or overly protective of their heads being used as target practice for pitchers that can throw upwards of 98 miles an hour, and rightly so. Speaking specifically to last night’s situation, Crisp’s lead off third and causing the balk was a great play and only someone with his type of speed can pull off. Sure, it's a tricky underhanded way to score a run, but it's legal. Cabrera’s temper got the best of him and in his mind, the best way to send a message to Boston’s bench to not make clean plays to score runs was to throw a 95 mph fastball behind Pedroia’s head.

Meanwhile, in the baseball world that matters, Boston did go on to win the game 4-0 and finish their first seven games in September with a 6-1 record. New York kept pace beating the Royals more soundly than the score showed. The final was 3-2, but the Yankees left the bases loaded in the sixth and the seventh and easily could have made the game 7-2 or more. I’m not looking for the Royals to win a single game the rest of the series with Andy Pettitte pitching tonight and Chin Meng Wang pitching Sunday. Boston is going to have to sweep the Orioles, bottom line. Well, I take that back a little. It would be nice if they swept the O’s. Good news for Boston is they’ll return to Fenway on Monday for a series against the Devil Rays and the Yankees will stay out for the second leg of their nine game road trip and travel to play Toronto.

-Jon Lester had a strong road outing last night against the O’s, pitching seven shut-out frames.

-Kevin Youkilis set the American League errorless streak at first base last night also. He has played in 179 games at first with no errors and should be on his way to a Golden Glove. The all time record is currently at 193 straight and held by Steve Garvey which could fall this season. Garvey was on an episode of Baywatch once.

-On the comeback trail, Manny Ramirez should take some swings this weekend which would show he is in the final stages of recovery after a strained left oblique left him on the sidelines since August 28^th.

-Prospective Boston pitching phenom Clay Buchholz pitched three more innings of shut-out baseball in relief in Thursday’s game against last Saturday's no-hitter victim Baltimore.

-Dice-K will be seeking his 15^th win this season tonight against Jon Leicester of the Orioles.

Some Stuff Condensed

A lot has happened since the last post on this site. If you read this blog as a means to keep up with the Sox, which I’m sure exactly no one in the free world does, then you missed the Yankee’s sweeping of the Sox, a no hitter from Boston Rookie Clay Buchholtz on Saturday night and the Sox lead in the East fluctuating from eight games, to five and back up to seven. You've also been missing my run-on sentences too, haven't you?

Manny is also out and has been since the series down in New York. Manny being out surprisingly hasn’t been much of a factor because of the play of PawSox call-ups Jacoby Ellsbury, Brandon Moss and mid-season acquisition Bobby Kielty.

Other regular day players are starting to heat up as well. The ever-reliable Mike Lowell is still going strong, David Ortiz is finally hitting his paycheck weight and Dustin Pedroia continues his campaign for AL rookie of the year. JD Drew, possibly the season’s biggest disappointment is finding his groove despite the fact he does all he can to avoid it.

The starting pitching is holding up when they aren’t playing in the Bronx and looking every part of a playoff rotation. With the starting three being arguably the most solid in the entire league with Daisuke Matsuzaka, Josh Beckett and Curt Schilling, it's hard to deny they can make serious strides in post-season play. If Tim Wakefield can defy age and Jon Lester can remain consistent the five will be in great shape. Now that Buchholz is on the map in a big way, it will be interesting to see how he’s utilized down the stretch and possibly into the playoffs with him being activated to the 25-man roster just in the nick of time. Don’t hate either, Buchholz’s no-no was no fluke. Hopefully he turns out to be the real deal for a long time to come.

Oh, and another thing. Fuck Julian Tavarez. I fucking hate that guy.